Intrigued by the title? Read on.
A couple posts back I filled you in on the wonderful story of our last pregnancy and the birth of our second son, Tanner. What I spared you were the details that most couples/women keep IN the delivery room. The not so wonderful ones. If you already had kids, you know what I mean :).
I had dinner with my girlfriends from college recently (St. Pat’s Day), and this setting was the perfect setting to go into these gruesome details. The not so pretty labor/delivery stories that when told among friends bring roaring laughter. All the mothers had something not so pretty to share, and our pregnant friend was definitely intrigued to hear about them, because you really don’t read about this stuff in ANY pregnancy book. Then one of my friends mentioned that these types of stories SHOULD be in a book.
Then I realized why not? This stuff is pretty funny (well not when it is actually happening) but it could actually help woman get REALLY ready for labor and delivery, plus give them a good laugh or two. Sort of like a sneak peak inside the delivery room ‘funniest home videos’ style…but in words, not videos…videos of this stuff would be AWFUL. 🙂
So I will go there for this post and share with you one funny moment (that I haven’t even shared with my husband)…
As you know, I am all for getting the epidural. I actually don’t know how people can go without it (more power to you if you are one of those super-women). But with the epidural this time around, my WHOLE lower body was completely numb, like I couldn’t move ANYTHING. I definitely remember having some feeling with my first one. Even the nurse thought it was funny when she would come in every time and my legs were off the bed and I didn’t even notice. I honestly felt bad seeing her have to pick up my legs to move me around all the time.
One time I decided enough was enough, that poor little lady has to pick up my dead legs again….I need to help her, but how?
So I had this great idea that when she started to lift up my legs to switch me from laying flat to laying on my left side, I would help her by grabbing the left handrail of the bed with my hand to help pull myself to that side. As I did that, I took my right hand and put it on my butt thinking that would help with the maneuvering. OMG! I stopped that moment and was freaked out!
The butt I was feeling was totally numb so it felt like I was touching someone else’s a**. It was horrific! As I am continuing to feel up this other person’s butt, I couldn’t believe how HUGE this thing was. How come I never noticed my butt was this big, and the fact that I was laying on my side now so it was a droopy butt at that. I swear I look at this thing in the mirror and felt it before (when it had feeling) and know it wasn’t at all considered small, but NEVER in my wildest dreams thought it could ever FEEL this big. I had to take a moment and look back to make sure I was really touching my own butt. I was.
It was at that moment that I realized once this labor/delivery/recovery thing was over and I had feeling back in my toosh, it will be my goal to make it smaller. A toosh that if ever numb again I can be proud of. 🙂
And with that quirky story, and the fact that I signed up a few months ago for the Traverse City Bayshore 10K this upcoming May…it is about time to get my a** in gear and get this baby weight and large a**… off me.
And to trick myself into wanting to work out, I got everything ready to go beforehand. I bought my new Brooks running shoes at Playmakers, got the Nike+ hooked up to them to use with my iPhone, I am borrowing my awesome friend Amy’s treadmill and just got done creating a VERY cool iTunes playlist to keep me jamming out and not slowing down.
Starting out slow, I ran for twenty minutes on Wednesday and ran 2.5 miles yesterday. My 8-week training schedule for my 10K officially starts next week, but wanted to make sure I was going to be able to HANG come Monday…
And hopefully my a** will eventually HANG a little less too.
Thanks for reading!
P.S. Let me know if you would like to be a chapter in my What to Expect When You’re in the Delivery Room book. 🙂